In response to the comment by INNochka1970
You can always at least try to come to an agreement with people, and if that doesn’t help, you can even involve the local police officer. And giving people hemorrhoids all over their heads without even trying to talk to them, what is that called? After all, what does it mean to contact a local police officer? It’s okay if he just comes, talks verbally and that’s it. But according to the rules, he will have to draw up the appropriate piece of paper. And this is already a stigma on people that can create problems for them. And now, attention, a question. What goal are you (in this case not you specifically, figuratively) pursuing? Do you feel sorry for the child? Or do you want to spoil your neighbors? It is unlikely that the child will be better off if you screw his parents. So thank God that neither my sister nor we (my sister and her children were staying with us) had no “compassionate” neighbors. We still didn't have enough problems with law enforcement agencies out of the blue.
I don’t know the subtleties, but in principle he won’t draw up any papers if there are no grounds. I don’t know how it is now, but before you just go to the district police officer and talk about the problem and ask them to sort it out. You don’t write a statement - then - yes, then they begin all sorts of “papers”, but you just ask...INNOchka1970 writes:
After all, what does it mean to contact a local police officer? It’s okay if he just comes, talks verbally and that’s it. But according to the rules, he will have to draw up the appropriate piece of paper
.
Well, as I understand it, the goal is to figure out what is happening and whether there is any danger to the child...INNOchka1970 writes:
) what goal are you pursuing? Do you feel sorry for the child? Or do you want to spoil your neighbors?
You know, we had an elderly couple living upstairs. There was a rumor that she had suffered a stroke. Terrible screams were heard from the apartment. The neighbors met her husband, asked what was the matter, he answered, she was sick, but everything was fine... So what can you do? I didn’t let anyone in the door.
Believe me, I had no intention of harming him, but I understood that something strange was happening and went to the district police officer. No one drew up any papers, but of course he let him into the apartment. And there it was a nightmare and horror. This woman was practically rotting alive - she had bedsores and... In short, okay, I won’t write the details here. Well, they sent her to the hospital, of course... When the local police officer called, they quickly took her away, but as her husband said, there was no questioning - it seemed that even the ambulance refused to come to her. I don’t know how true this is, but then she was immediately taken away...
Well, the author will go to the neighbors and they will tell her that everything is fine with us, it’s just a nervous child. So what? No one knows the truth and the problem, if there is one, will not be solved. The district police officer, it seems to me, will professionally assess the situation and draw conclusions.
In general, I don’t quite understand why many people here are so afraid of causing problems for their neighbors. The neighbors don’t bother that their screams are disturbing, but we, like, have to be delicate...
In the modern world, most city dwellers live in apartment buildings, which means they must have neighbors. On the one hand, it’s safer in terms of safety (the inhabitants of the apartment nearby can always come to the rescue in an emergency, for example, in case of a fire, robbery, or flooding). On the other hand, this means that people whose homes are separated by walls must respect each other's rights. One of these rights is the right to rest and freedom from noise at certain times of the day.
The neighbor's child constantly runs around and cries loudly - what should I do?
It happens that neighbors have small children, to whom it is not always possible to explain when it is allowed to make noise, and when parents can be held accountable for this. What to do if children's screams and crying at night have become a constant problem?
Important! If a conflict situation arises with your neighbors, you should first try to resolve the problem through negotiations with them.
There may be several options for solving this problem, depending on the cause of the disturbance, the duration and intensity of children’s screams, as well as the degree of involvement of the adult inhabitants of the neighboring apartment in resolving the conflict situation.
Peaceful conversation
Before writing a complaint against your neighbors to any authority, you should resort to joint resolution of the issue of disturbing the silence.
Perhaps they have a screaming baby who is teething or who is suffering from an illness. Or the child has nightmares.
You need to ask your neighbors to calm your child down in time, interrupting his crying, or offer to jointly take care of providing additional sound insulation of walls and ceilings. As a rule, if the neighbors are reasonable and committed to a peaceful existence, then holding a conversation is enough.
It’s another matter if neighbors ignore complaints about noise from the apartment or their response borders on aggression. In this case, it is necessary to resort to more drastic measures.
Silence law - where to complain?
Attention! The right to silence is protected by law.
In accordance with “On the sanitary and epidemiological welfare of the population,” from 7:00 to 23:00 it should not be higher than 40 dB, and from 23:00 to 7:00 – 30 dB.
Otherwise, the neighbors of the troublemakers have the right to invite a local police officer and order an examination that will determine the noise level; based on the results of the examination and the testimony of witnesses, indicating the place and time of the examination, the conditions for taking measurements, and the technical data of the equipment used, a lawsuit should be filed against the neighbors.
Application to the guardianship authorities
If a child cries or screams for a long time, and adults do not react to this or are completely absent from the apartment, then you can write a statement to the guardianship authorities.
The basis for this may be leaving a minor in danger or inadequate care.
Let's say parents can leave their children alone, locked in an apartment for a long time. They may also be in the next room, but not monitor the child’s behavior for various reasons: due to a frivolous attitude towards raising and caring for children, due to being under the influence of alcohol or drugs, etc.
Guardianship must register such parents and conduct systematic monitoring of the living conditions of a given family and the behavior of parents in relation to their growing offspring.
Where to turn if a child is being bullied - they beat him and he screams?
When there is a serious suspicion that the child is screaming as a result of beatings inflicted by parents and other relatives, or there is evidence supported by photographs or testimony that there is a fact of bullying and violence against a minor (bruises, abrasions, fractures, etc.), then you should contact the police immediately.
It should be remembered that determination and the desire to publicize the case can prevent a serious crime - causing serious injury or murder of a child.
Call the police
If there are serious reasons to think that neighbors are bullying a minor, both physically and morally, resulting in noise being made, then, first of all, you need to call the local police officer and clearly explain the situation, clearly stating your details and information about neighbors , their residential address.
You need to speak to the point, without making subjective assessments of what is happening. Police officers are required to arrive at the place of call and verify the accuracy of the information received.
Complaint to the guardianship authorities
In addition to calling law enforcement officers, it is also necessary to file a complaint with the guardianship authorities. Specialists from the guardianship and trusteeship service will be required to check the financial living conditions of the family and, if necessary, order a medical examination of the child for injuries and other signs of violent acts.
If the situation is absolutely critical, the child will be removed from the family, and the parents will first be limited in parental rights for six months, then, if no signs of improvement in their behavior are recorded, the final deprivation of rights to the child will follow.
A complaint to guardianship should be written according to the established format.. The complaint must indicate the full name of the applicant and neighbors, residential address, name of the government agency, reasons for applying for guardianship, laws governing this issue, a petition on the merits of the case (a request to conduct an appropriate check, deprive parental rights, etc.), date and signature of the citizen who submitted the appeal and his contact telephone number for feedback.
Sometimes parents yell at their children. Out of powerlessness, out of habit, after a hard day - anything happens. And more and more on social networks there are videos of mothers swearing at their children, filmed by caring passers-by, under which a general chorus of commentators screams: call the guardianship, call the police! Let's figure out what to do if parents yell at their children on the street, and you see it, or neighbors behind the wall - seemingly prosperous people - scold their children so loudly that it bothers you. To call or not to call the guardianship? To call or not to call the police? What should I do? What should parents do if they lash out at their children and it bothers those around them?
Before you intervene, think about three things:
Is there a threat to the safety, health or life of the child?
Do you want to help a child or punish a mother who is unrestrained in emotions and language?
Do you want to make a video to post it on your blog and get likes?
Option three is ugly. You interfere (brazenly, unceremoniously and irresponsibly) in someone else's life. There is no need to do this.
If the first question is relevant, then you should call the police, clearly explaining what is happening: the child is being beaten, the child fell on the asphalt and covers his head with his hands, the beating parent looks drunk, the child runs to you and shouts “save me!”
When else can you call the police? When the screams behind the wall contain obvious threats to the child - “the father will come and add more!”, “Oh, you creature, you will sleep on the bare floor!”
If, answering the second question, you understand that you are driven primarily by the desire to “teach this careless mother a lesson,” better stop. And return to point one.
Should I call guardianship?
If there is no situation threatening the life and safety of the child, the guardianship authorities will not do anything, they will only look at the conditions in which the child lives.
Do you think that children should be taken away from “people like these”? There will be no less screaming at the reception center, but the mother will not be there, and the child will not be at home. In such a scenario, there is nothing but a worsening situation for the child.
Should you call the police?
If there is a danger to the child's life - yes. If there is no danger to the child's life, then the police do not need to be called.
What can the police do? If the police are allowed into the apartment (and they are not required to be allowed in without a piece of paper from the court), then with the consent of those who live in it, they will inspect the apartment and talk to the child (if the parents do not mind). If the child looks normal and there is no reason to believe that the parents’ behavior threatens his life and health, then that’s all.
If you write a statement, the police will interview your neighbors, interview you, draw up a report and hand it over to the local police officer to sort it out. The district police officer can call the parents for a conversation or come to their home. If they have not committed actions that the law classifies as child abuse, then the district police officer will write a refusal to initiate a criminal case.
But if complaints about noisy neighbors are frequent, the family may be registered with the juvenile affairs commission. And the guardianship authorities will closely monitor that the child leads a normal life.
The police can prevent a crime, but in a situation of “normal” family squabbling, the child will not receive help from the police - on the contrary, the child may be afraid that mom and dad will be arrested.
Does it make sense to scare neighbors with police and guardianship?
No. You will only turn people against you. Either make them more nervous if they just lost their temper, or you will get rude if swearing is their usual way of communicating. Neither one nor the other will make the child feel better.
Will attempts to exhort parents who swear at their children give anything?
Unlikely. Adults have a negative attitude towards criticism and evaluation of their actions when they did not ask for it. To your cries of “What are you doing, are you yelling at a child?”, you will most likely be answered with rudeness or a cold request not to interfere. If you explain why you shouldn’t shout at children, they will probably respond with the same thing. This will not make anyone feel better, especially not a child.
What can be done when neighbors shout at children?
From a legal point of view
says Maria Merkuryeva, lawyer:
Call the police. If there are several appeals, the juvenile affairs commission will become involved. Complain to guardianship. Complain to the prosecutor's office. These bodies are required to protect children from violence.
Even if you have already complained and nothing has changed, continue to complain. Better - in writing. If they do not take any action, you can complain about them - to higher authorities or a higher prosecutor's office.
In addition, you can talk to the child in a neighborly manner, if he is already old enough, tell him that he can contact the guardianship authorities himself if a situation in the family is dangerous for him.
From an ethical point of view
says Svetlana Mokhova, candidate of psychological sciences, forensic psychologist:
Ideally, good neighborly relations will help. If there are any, you can talk to the screaming neighbors and how their screams are bothering you, and ask if they are okay and offer some help.
With an older child, neighbors with whom the family is on good terms can talk directly, ask how he is doing, say “come if you want to talk” or “I care how you feel.”
For parents, good neighborly relations are an opportunity to seek help and receive support. And in moments of nervous breakdowns they are especially needed. It is unlikely that anyone will scream from an excess of mental well-being.
The police and guardians should be called in case of great dangers. Most often, there is no great danger to the child from the screaming of the parents. But the police and guardianship will not prevent the danger to the formation of the psyche, character, and self-esteem; this can be prevented by caring people.
What to do if someone yells at a child on the street?
The best option, which rarely causes an aggressive reaction, is to ask your mother (father) if you need help? And if necessary, provide this help. If not, be prepared to move away.
The guardian will not go outside when called. The police will go if a child is beaten, if they are swinging at him, if the child is bleeding, if he asks you to save him from an adult. That is, when there is reason to suspect physical violence.
What to do if the screaming parents are you, and the neighbors called the guard?
Guardianship usually warns you about a visit, and will look at how you live - whether the child has a bed, whether there is food in the house, whether there are toys and books appropriate for the child’s age. If there is no threat to the life and health of the child and everything is normal in the house, no action will follow from the guardianship. The guardianship has a policy: do not touch the family. But you may have to explain yourself, tell what happened to you.
If you can’t cope - you need psychological or material help - you can ask guardianship how they can help (this does not mean that help will be provided, but asking for help is appropriate and sometimes, from the experience of parents, it helps to close issues with guardianship altogether enough fast).
If a representative of the guardianship authorities decides that something is wrong, they will give you time to correct the situation and come back with a second check.
But if appeals to the guardianship authorities continue, the situation does not improve, then after the third inspection the family may be recognized as being in a socially dangerous situation (SOP), then there is a risk of children being removed from the family.
Are parents breaking the law when they yell at their children?
Maria Merkuryeva, lawyer says:
Violate. Parents are responsible for the upbringing and development of their children. They are obliged to take care of the health, physical, mental, spiritual and moral development of children - this is Article 63 of the Family Code.
There is also the Declaration of the Rights of the Child and the Convention on the Rights of the Child - international documents that provide special protection to children as people who have less ability to protect themselves. In accordance with them, for the full and harmonious development of his personality, a child needs to grow up in a family environment, in an atmosphere of happiness, love and understanding. The interests of the child should be the primary concern of parents and government agencies.
The principles of international acts are developed in more detail in the Law on Basic Guarantees of the Rights of the Child in the Russian Federation and are applied by courts when considering any cases related to children.
For failure to fulfill the duties of raising children, different types of parental responsibility are established: criminal (Article 156 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation), civil (Part 2 of Article 91 of the Housing Code of the Russian Federation), administrative law (Article 5.35 of the Code of the Russian Federation on Administrative Offenses ), family law (Articles 69, 73 of the Family Code of the Russian Federation).
Is swearing considered child abuse in the eyes of the law?
The law protects the child from all forms of physical or psychological violence, insult or abuse, neglect or neglect, abuse or exploitation, including sexual abuse. It is assumed that the parents protect the child from this, and if the parents do not protect or are themselves to blame, the state intervenes.
However, there are no specific rules for determining what will be violence (or not) in everyday life. The main thing is causing mental or physical harm to the child. Harm as a basis for bringing liability can be either real (that is, the child has actually suffered from screaming) or potential.
A detailed description of violence is found only in criminal law. Criminal liability has been established for failure to fulfill parental responsibilities associated with child abuse. Abuse specifically: deprivation of food, shoes and clothing, gross violation of the daily routine determined by the psychophysiological needs of a child of a certain age, deprivation of sleep and rest, failure to comply with basic hygiene standards (resulting, for example, in head lice, scabies, etc.), failure to follow recommendations and doctor’s instructions for the prevention of diseases and treatment of the child, refusal or evasion of providing the child with necessary medical care, etc., as well as the use of unacceptable (in the legal and moral sense) methods of education and treatment of the child, including all types of mental, physical and sexual violence against children.
Can a child be removed from the family if his parents scold him in a raised voice?
A child can be taken away if there is an immediate threat to his life or health - this is the norm in Article 77 of the Family Code. The article does not explain what exactly is considered an immediate threat, that is, this decision remains at the discretion of the guardianship authorities.
In addition, the police can pick up a child if he is found to be neglected. Sometimes the police believe that a child is neglected even when the parents are nearby - if, in the opinion of the police, the parents are not able to supervise the child.
If a child is taken away, the guardianship authorities are required to draw up an act and, within a few days, notify the prosecutor's office and submit to the court an application for deprivation or restriction of parental rights.
If a “neglected” child is removed, then it is not necessary to demand deprivation of parental rights: when the police find the parents (or the ability to look after the child returns to the existing ones), the child returns to the family.
The likelihood of seizure without serious reasons is very low. But it exists, because there are no clear rules for removal, and guardianship officers may make the wrong decision.
According to neighbors, a little boy of about three years old is constantly crying, screaming and hysterical behind the wall. Neighbors are sure that the boy is constantly in one place in the room, from which he is never allowed out. The adults of this family - mother and her two husbands, former and current - often quarrel among themselves and even fight. From time to time, adults come to them at night, but none of the neighbors have seen the doctors.
The neighbors think that the boy is seriously ill, but no one is taking care of him. Moreover, they believe that his parents tie him and his crib to the radiator. An older girl also lives in the apartment, but the children very rarely go out for walks, if at all.
Maria D.'s relatives called the police, applied to the guardianship (albeit in the wrong area, which was needed, and did not complete the matter), but there was no result. What result is needed? Help children who, according to neighbors, are clearly suffering.
In the care of the area where the family lives, because of which the neighbors cry and cannot sleep at night, they explained to us that they know about her and visit her periodically. Moreover, there are four children in the apartment - indeed, from two husbands, former and current. But men work, no one leads a wild lifestyle.
“Yes, my mother there is not a very healthy person with a difficult past, she looks exhausted,” they told us. – The apartment is very crowded - there are a lot of adults and children, but the family is waiting to move in. They probably have some scandals too. But the children are well-groomed, cheerful, and fed. Yes, they are poor, but they are always clean. We believe that this is not a family from which children should be removed.”
The guardianship promised us that they would visit the family, about whom the neighbors were worried, in the next few days and find out why the family’s neighbors could not sleep peacefully.
This story made us ask the question: what should be the actions of a stranger who cares about other people’s children in order for them to be effective? We asked guardianship and trusteeship officials to answer the most common questions related to this.
Is it always necessary to immediately contact the guardianship authorities?
If you do not observe a direct threat to the child’s life - no one is holding him by the legs upside down in an open window (in such a case, it is better to immediately call the police), or you doubt whether this threat exists, then it is best to first try to find out for yourself what is happening neighbors and whether to sound the alarm.
If, after finding out, you are still not sure about the child’s safety, and you think that his parents are fulfilling their duties improperly (they do not feed the child, beat him, yell at him, do not take him out for a walk, do not clean the apartment, etc. ), then you can write an application to the guardianship and trusteeship authorities at the child’s place of residence.
The application can not only be sent by paper letter or brought to the guardianship, but you can even send it by email - now all addresses and telephone numbers can be easily found on the Internet.
When does guardianship go to check on the family?
Still from the film “Nightmare Behind the Wall” (2011). Photo from the site vokrug.tv
The guardianship is obliged to check all statements that contain information that the child is left without parental care or is in conditions that pose a threat to his life and health. Moreover, the inspection is carried out within three days (according to Article 122 of the Family Code of the Russian Federation).
Guardianship officers testify that often the facts stated in statements from citizens are not confirmed and are unreliable. Neighbors quarrel or cannot find a common language, and in this case, an application for guardianship is a way to somehow complicate the opponent’s life.
Do guardianship authorities check anonymous requests?
They check, but it is better that the application is signed. This makes it easier for guardianship representatives to motivate their visit to the family.
The applicant will not bear any responsibility if his information is not confirmed. However, the family that was visited can sue the applicant for libel.
Is the child always taken away if the information in the application is confirmed?
No, not at all. A child is removed from the family only if there is a clear threat to his life and health, that is, something visible to the naked eye: obvious abuse (the child is chained or lives with dogs, for example), bruises and wounds on the child’s body , unsanitary conditions, lack of food, drunk parents.
According to the guardianship staff, a long process begins with a family in crisis - children are never taken away immediately if there is confidence that the parents will be able to correct the situation - stop drinking, find a job, put the apartment in order, turn to social protection authorities for help.
A family in a socially dangerous situation (as recognized by the commission on juvenile affairs) should not be left alone. It will definitely be supervised either by guardianship specialists, or employees of a social rehabilitation center, etc.
What to do if the guardianship authorities are notified about a truly crisis family, but it still seems to you that the situation is not changing?
Alena Sinkevich, coordinator of the “Close People” project of the Volunteers to Help Orphans Charitable Foundation, believes that in this case it is the neighbors themselves who can become a support for such a family.
– It is important to turn to professionals when common sense is not enough, when the situation seems wild. But it is often difficult to decide on this, because the line between snitching and active citizenship is very thin. There is always a fear: what if, after my statement to the police or guardianship, all these authorities in the life of the family make a mess?
It is scary to become an informer, but without a civic position it is impossible to build a civil society. Our civic position is manifested in the fact that we don’t give a damn when a child is beaten behind a wall. But often this is not a criterion of disadvantage. Of course, you can immediately complain to the guardianship and wait until the children are taken from the family. But what option can be offered to them, other than an orphanage?
And I would start with neighborly help to a family that you think needs help.
Neighbors who care about children are the very people who can offer to walk with children, work with them, look after them, etc. It is the neighbors, in addition to the police officers and guardians, who are the people whom a family in crisis will be able to let in.
In order for a family to let neighbors in, they must first offer something enticing. In critical situations, the principle of “give the bait, not the fish” does not work. The family’s resources are low and it is necessary to start with the “fish”: give them food, sleep, warmth, and offer other basic things. And then think about the “fishing rod”.
This way, neighbors will be able to find out the real state of affairs and build support routes with the help of professionals (guardianship authorities, employees of special non-profit organizations).
It is important not to reproach people, not to tell them how wrong they are, but to offer to go for a walk with the children or bring food. All families in crisis have a sea of critics and very few helpers.
This is called "community support." A community can be geographical (neighbors), social (neighborhood cleaners), religious (church parishioners).
It is important that the community wants to help and provide support. It is necessary for someone sane to be able to correctly ask for help. It is important that they do not collect money - it will not help, but ask to help the family with services.
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